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The truth about lying (DW#295)
As we wrap up our discussion on telling the truth about lying, let’s look at some interesting facts and studies from experts about truth and lying
· Research by Kim Serota, a marketing professor at Oakland University suggests that at least in North America, the average person tells one to two lies a day. (People tell more lies in January than any other month. The average person tells 217 lies in January (about seven per day). His research also suggests that "prolific liars" tell a lot more lies than that – according to his study, 5% of people tell approximately half of all lies!
· Most lies are told to get ahead in the workplace, to avoid being criticised or rejected or to hide something from family members. The most benign reason that people lie is to avoid hurting someone’s feelings.
· Our culture condones dishonesty and because of this, our own truthfulness declines . "There’s something antisocial about being too honest," says David...
Two kinds of truth (DW#291)
Last week we started the conversation about the foundational principle of mindful speech: speaking the truth.
There are two kinds of truth to aim for:
The objective truth: that is what happened or did not happen. This kind of truth is that which is objectively verifiable, quantifiable and measurable, and not influenced by emotions, opinions or personal feelings.
These are the kinds of things that plaintiffs and witnesses (and family members!) are cross-examined on:
Where were you?
Who were you with?
Who else was there?
How did the car get dented?
Who ate the last cookie? ;)
The other kind of truth is subjective truth: speaking about that which is based on our own internal experience, emotions or opinions.
Speaking the truth about what is true for us (with grace and compassion) is the doorway to intimacy as it invites another person to share our experience and internal world. It is about speaking what is in our hearts.
Some examples of invitations to share our objective truth are:
How do...