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When you are stuck in traffic (or in the s.l.o.w.e.s.t line at the grocery store), how do you react? If all you can think of is how much of your time is being wasted and why cannot everyone just hurry up and get out of your way, then you need to know something.

Impatience like this speeds up your pulse, your blood pressure rises and your breath becomes shallow. Short, shallow jerky breaths in turn compound your frustration because your body is not getting enough oxygen.

And because it takes time to calm down from such impatience, the quality of your life during this time is greatly impacted. Impatience has caused you to lose a great deal in terms of health, wellbeing and lifespan. In other words, by being frustrated about the loss of your time you have ended up losing more time in a way.

Yikes.

Learning to breathe intentionally in situations like this can provide a valuable alternate to the biological alarm and fight/flight response.

As soon as you notice your impatience, take it as...

A very simple way to slow and elongate your breath is to practice breathing into your belly.

As you inhale (through your nose, remember?), watch your belly blow up like a balloon. Fill up the balloon as much as you can and then watch it deflate as you exhale.

(Even young children can be taught to breathe like this by keeping a stuffed toy on their belly. As they breathe in, the stuffed toy will rise and and fall as they breathe out. You can also keep something light on your belly to raise your awareness of your breathing).

Breathing like this allows up to seven times more oxygen into your blood and your system than shallow breathing. That’s right. SEVEN TIMES.

Breathing like this counteracts the loss of flexibility in the lungs that happens with age.

As we grow older, we tend to lose more and more flexibility in our chest and lungs. If measures aren’t taken to counteract this disposition, we experience and constriction in the chest area. We become more hunched when we...

In the last post, we talked about how we can manage our stress response through breathing.

Today let us talk about what researchers call the "resonant rate" of breathing. This is the optimal breathing rate—the rate at which you flip the switch to your parasympathetic nervous system and slow down your heart rate. When you breathe at the optimal rate, your PNS calms down and your brain waves settle into a calm, healthy and happy rhythm.

Do you know how fast you are breathing as compared to the optimal rate? Before going any further, go ahead and open the stopwatch on your phone and measure your breath for 30 seconds and then multiply by 2.

How many breaths a minute did you clock in? Mine was 15 and I thought I was relaxed at the time.

According to researchers, the optimal breathing rate is between 3.5 to 5 breaths per minute. In other words, each breath should last between 12 to 17 seconds.

That is way, way slower than most of us breathing at the moment. And we are not going to...

Let us talk some more about how our breathing is related to our stress levels.

As you may know, our nervous systems have two parts: the parasympathetic nervous system(PNS) and thesympathetic nervous system(SNS). The parasympathetic system takes care of the "rest and digest" side of things while the sympathetic system takes care of "fight or flight" stuff. In short, we have the relaxation response and the stress response.

We obviously need both and each have an important role to play in our functioning and wellbeing.

Here is the problem though: modern life has thrown us into a near-constant state of arousal and hypervigilance and for most of us, our sympathetic nervous system works overtime, leading to all stress, dysfunction and burnout. In other words, our PNS and SNS become unbalanced, one working overtime and other lying dormant.

How can we learn to balance these two for optimal wellbeing?

The fastest and simplest way is to become intentional about breathing.

Try this now:

Take a...

We have all heard the term: take a deep breath when you are stressed. And so, we do. And wonder why it does not work to calm us down.

It is because we only focus on the inbreath and do not pay attention to the outbreath.

If we are not exhaling properly, not only can we not calm down, we are also not detoxifying fully. Did you know that breathing is responsible for 70% of our body’s detoxification? Compared to this, elimination and sweat only take care of only 30%!

And when we do not detoxify properly, we are not fueling our cells properly. This pattern results in compromised wellbeing on many different levels.

So, go ahead: squeeze your diaphragm. Make sure to get all the air out before your next inbreath. Focus on the exhale and the inhale will almost take care of itself.

The second rule of optimal breathing is to breathe deeply.

When we are stressed, our breath becomes very shallow, reaching only until our chest. When we breathe like this, it is a signal to the body to be on high alert.

Breathing like this fuels the flight or fight mechanism of our nervous system. We body gets more tense and we cannot relax. If we are in a situation of danger this mechanism really helps us by driving the oxygen and energy where it is needed, to our arms and legs: to fight the situation or to run away from danger. It does this by turning the energy away from organs that do not need it in the present situation . . .our brains, the digestive system, the lymphatic system that repairs the body.

Breathings shallow is less than useful (and destructive) when there is no danger or only imagined danger.

This is why it is important to practice breathing deeply.

So, go ahead and use your diaphragm – an important and much underutilized muscle in our body.

Fill up the lower...

The first rule of optimal breathing is to breathe through your nose. All the time. Yes, even when working out and sleeping!

Here’s why:

1) Our nose filters, humidifies and conditions the air we breathe in ways that our mouth simply is not designed to do.

2) Our ancestors did not breathe through their mouth except when they were in danger or under the most extreme instances of physical exertion. For example, when they were being chased by tigers or being hunted for food!

3) We tend to "overbreathe" when we breathe through our mouth. That is, we take fast, short and shallow breaths. This rhythm disrupts the oxygen to carbon dioxide ratios in our body. Surprisingly, it is carbon dioxide that actually gets the oxygen out of our red blood cells and into our tissues and organs. When we breathe through our nose, we balance the oxygen and carbon dioxide ratios in our body, and the oxygen can get to where it is needed.

Over the weekend did you complete the ‘noticing your breath’ assignment? Have you been noticing your breath? What have you noticed?

Do you breathe through your mouth or your nose? (Many people breath thru their mouth. Look around and/or in the mirror. Notice yourself and others. How many mouths do you see open?)

Do you breathe deeply (and calmly) into your belly? (For many of us the breath stops at the chest, especially if we breathe through our mouths.)

How long is your exhale compared to your inhale? (If we are stressed, we gasp for air without emptying out our lungs fully)

Here are the three basic rules for breathing:

1. Breathe through your nose. All the time, even when exercising.
2. Breathe deep into your belly
3. And exhale slightly longer than you inhaled
Let us explore each of these a little more over the next few days.

If you are a perfectionist, you have already started researching the "best" and most "perfect" self-care routines. You may have downloaded some apps and trackers and telling yourself that once you have done enough research and have a handle on best practices, you will start your routine. (Please do not ask me how I know this . .)

If this describes you, please STOP right now.

Instead of making self-care an elaborate and unattainable practice that takes up three hours of your time, keep it super simple. Start with your most basic needs for now.

What is the most basic self-care routine that can have a major impact on our wellbeing?

Breathing.

Yes, yes, of course we are already doing it but in order to make it part of self-care, we need to be a little bit intentional about breathing.

Over the next couple of days, just notice how you are breathing. Is it shallow or deep? What happens to your breath when you are stressed or anxious?

One of the most important things to know about self-care is that it is individual. Your needs and my needs are different. What works for me may not work for you.

However, while there is no "one-size-fits-all" self-care plan that you can simply download and adopt, it is a good idea to attend to wellness in all the various domains of our lives.

Here are the various domains that need our attention:

Physical
Mental and intellectual
Emotional
Social
Vocational
Spiritual

So, let’s do a quick check in: how are you doing in these domains of your life? Chances are that you will be better at taking care of yourself in one area than others. Some of us are great at exercising but have a challenge with connecting to others. Others may be great at keeping their relationships strong but struggle to eat well or sleep properly.

If we can attend to the hitherto neglected areas of our lives and take baby steps in this area, we will see a big impact in our wellbeing.