Verse 159 from Sura Al-Imran: So by mercy from Allah, [O Muhammad], you were lenient with them. And if you had been rude [in speech] and harsh in heart, they would have disbanded from about you. So pardon them and ask forgiveness for them and consult them in the matter. And when you have decided, then rely upon Allah. Indeed, Allah loves those who rely [upon Him]. (Quran 3:159)
This verse refers to the Holy Prophet(saw)’s demeanor with his companions after the disaster on the battlefield of Uhud when some companions flagrantly disobeyed him. The Prophet did not reproach them harshly although the disobedience had led to a major defeat for the Muslims.
Here the Quran testifies to the gentle nature of the Prophet (saw) which endeared him to all, and it is reckoned as one of the Mercies of Allah. One of the Prophet's titles is "A Mercy to all Creation." At no time was this gentleness, this mercy, this long-suffering with human weaknesses, more valuable than...
"It is they who hasten to every good work and these who are foremost in them."
(SÅ«ratul Mu’minÅ«n, 23:61, Holy Quran)
Have you ever had a intention to do something good (give charity, help someone, reach out to someone going through a tough time, visit a loved one) and thought you would do it later but then never got around to it?
Research now confirms that the more you delay something, the less likely it is that you will actually do it.
Piers Steele, who won the equivalent of the Nobel Prize in psychology for his work on motivation says that "As the deadline for any task gets pushed further into the future, Delay increases and our motivation to tackle the tasks decreases."
The Law of Modeling says that "It’s hard to Improve When You Have No One but Yourself to Follow."
Whatever we are trying to achieve in life, someone else has already done it and is successful at it. Maxwell’s law of modeling is about finding mentors and role models that you can follow and work with to achieve what you want to.
Although Maxwell talks about finding a mentor or a coach to work with you on your journey, I believe that we can use the law of modeling much more broadly.
For example, if you want to improve your communication, look around you. Do you know an excellent communicator? Notice how they speak and how well they listen. What makes them effective?
Do you want to become healthier? Who do you know has transformed their fitness and health levels for the better? What did they do and how did they do it?
Even if we are successful in one domain of our lives, we can learn and model in other areas of our lives. For me the law of modeling...
Have you noticed how curious children are? They constantly want to know how things work or why they are the way they are. They rarely accept things at face value, an explanation is almost always required.
As we age, many of us begin to lose this natural curiosity.
In order to grow, learn something new or get better at anything, we need to get our curiosity back.
Maxwell suggests ten ways to re-cultivate our natural curiosity. Here are my favorites:
Have a Beginner’s Mind-Set
Maxwell says that in order to grow, we must keep our beginners’ mind-set. Instead of being a know it all who see themselves as experts, beginners spend their time asking questions like "how can we do...
Many of us want to do it all and have it all.
A wise teacher of mine once told me: yes, you CAN have it all – just not at the same time!
She was trying to explain what Maxwell calls the Law of Trade-Offs: that you have to give up something in the short term to get something in the long term.
If we want to grow in the health domain and get fitter for example, we have to give up the desire to sit on the couch in the short term to gain health in the long term. To put it another way, we need to be able to delay instant gratification in order to reap greater rewards later.
Given that all of us have limited time and resources, this law makes sense, right? I remember when I was writing the book, I gave up watching TV for a whole year. It was not easy in the short term but soooo fulfilling when it got done.
What are working on and what are you willing to trade to get it done?
Maxwell reminds us that growth thrives in conducive surroundings.
In nature, spring is the time for growth when conditions are right with warmer temperatures, longer days and more sunlight. On the other hand, when environmental conditions are not ideal, growth is stunted or delayed.
Similarly, for human beings to reach their full potential, we can flourish in the right environment. You and I experience personal growth when we surround ourselves with people and opportunities conducive to our development.
So what are some indications of an environment conducive to growth?
A place where we are continually challenged: A good growth environment puts pressure on us to improve. If our daily work is too easy or comfortable, then we shortchange ourselves and stunt our development. It’s okay and even healthy for us to be in over our heads from time to time. It forces us to swim against the current so to speak and we grow stronger as a result.
A place...
In The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth, John Maxwell writes that the way to reach our full potential and live a life of purpose is to choose a path of intentional growth. In explaining the "Laws of Growth" he suggests that personal development and growth follow set principles and laws that can be discovered and applied for sustained personal growth.
This week, let us explore 5 of the 15 laws that Maxwell teaches us.
The law of consistency: How many times have we heard or read something inspirational, tried it for a few days and then forgot all about it? According to Maxwell, the key to turning these lessons and motivations into permanent change is his fifth law of growth, the law of consistency. Maxwell says that the key to this law is that motivation gets you going, but discipline, keeps you growing. Discipline turns motivation and inspiration into habits and our habits determine our growth.
I love the way Steven Pressfield puts it in his...
When we are talking about making changes, we need to confront the reality that it will be uncomfortable. Our habits and routines may feel familiar and comfortable even if they do not work for usor lead us where we want to go. If we want to make positive changes in our lives however, we need to let go of the familiar and get comfortable with not being comfortable for the moment.
When I want to retreat towards safety rather than moving forward towards growth, I remind myself that ships are safe in harbour but that is not what ships are built for.
So let us leave our safe harbours and venture out to the scary but exciting open sea. Let us be brave enough to bear the discomfort of stretching ourselves to discover the limits of our own potential.
In The 15 invaluable Laws of Growth John Maxwell outlines some gaps and limiting beliefs that keep us stuck in unhealthy ways and stop us from reaching our full potential.
Here are the 7 "gaps" that he identifies:
The Assumption Gap—I assume that I will automatically grow.
The Knowledge Gap—I don’t know how to grow.
The Timing Gap—It’s not the right time to begin.
The Mistake Gap—I’m afraid of making mistakes.
The Perfection Gap—I have to find the best way before I start.
The Inspiration Gap—I don’t feel like doing it.
The Comparison Gap—Others are better than I am.
The Expectation Gap—I thought it would be easier than this.
You know the domains and growth areas that we identified a couple of days ago? Just go...
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