Silly small steps(DW #825)
One of my teachers/mentors like to hammer in this point: when we planning a new habit or a change in behaviour, we need to make it EASY TO WIN.
When we are designing our new behaviours (yes DESIGNING – acting on purpose and with intention), we need to plan for days when we have the LEAST motivation.
This is not how most of us plan for change though.
We plan on change and new habits when we are the height of inspiration and motivation. And think we can take on the world.
WE ARE SO INSPIRED! We commit to huge goals – meditating for an hour, walking 10,000 steps, never eating sugar again etc., etc., etc.
And then real life hits. We have a sleepless night. The kids are being …. Children! We are tired and cranky and the last thing on our minds and within our energetic bandwidth is to work on self-improvement.
And when we fail to meet our goals, we think there is a big problem with us.
In his EXCELLENT book, Tiny Habits, BJ Fogg reminds us that: "We are not the problem. Our approach to change is. It’s a design flaw—not a personal flaw."
A design flaw in our plan and not a personal flaw which cannot be fixed.
PHEW.
So much easier to redesign our plan than deal with a personal flaw and shortcoming, right?
So here is Rule #1 of Habit change: Make it EASY to win.
Make the wins "silly simple". So silly that it makes no sense to not do them.
Here are some examples of silly simple habits:
5 mindful breaths before – or after - Fajr.
1 30 second plank before your shower.
Reading 1 page at night.
Eating one salad leaf a day.
Going to bed 15 minutes earlier.
These sound really silly, right?
THAT IS THE POINT.
Make your new habits so tiny that it makes no sense not to do them.
And this is how you win at habit change.
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