What does an emotional overreaction look like? (DW#462)
We have begun hinting at emotional overreactions for the last few days. Just to be clear, emotional overreactions do not only mean exploding or shouting in anger.
Different people cope differently when they are emotionally triggered: some may explode and others may shut down and disengage from the other person.
An external overreaction or explosion is visible. Others can see for example, if we lash out in anger, throw our hands up or have an angry expression.
An internal overreaction (or "implosion") on the other hand is an emotional response that may be undetected by onlookers. We may appear to be calm on the outside even though an emotional storm is brewing inside. At this point we are so emotionally flooded that we cannot think straight. We may be replaying a situation over and over in our heads, wondering if we said or did the right thing, overanalyzing a comment made by a friend or loved one or we may be having a stream of negative thoughts and emotions.
Make no mistake: although it looks very different from the outside, shutting down, stonewalling or distancing yourself from the conflict as a result of being emotionally triggered is also an overreaction and it can be even more damaging than a straight out emotional explosion.
Unless it is a temporary time out to soothe ourselves, emotional disengagement because we are triggered is harmful to ourselves and to our relationships with loved ones.
So let’s begin to recognize our automatic strategy when we are triggered or stressed.
Are you an imploder or an exploder?
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