Behaviours not feelings determine how our life turns out (DW#470)

communication emotions Oct 11, 2018

We have been discussing how we can act in our own best interests even if we do not feel like it. 

I love the way Dan Millman puts it: 
"Of course, we don’t love painful feelings like anxiety or depression. We don’t have to love or even like them, but we do have to accept them, as difficult as that can seem at times. Emotions, no matter how painful they are, are not the problem. The problem is dropping out of schoolā€Øor work, putting your family or duties of life on hold until such time as you can work out your emotional issues. Would you rather feel depressed while sitting alone in your room trying to figure it all out or feel depressed while getting your house cleaned or your project completed? (You may still feel depressed, but you have a cleaner house.) 

So emotional intelligence does not mean that we do not have strong (and sometimes negative) feelings. The idea is that we can feel strong emotions but still be functional. We can act in our best interests and do what serves us long term despite how we feel. 

We can accept and learn from our feelings, enjoy (or not!) the roller coaster of emotions AND we don’t need to let them run our life. 

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